07/21/2009 06:58 pm ET Updated May 25, 2011

An Open Letter to President Obama

Dear President Obama:

My husband did his best to try to console me once it became clear that I wasn't among the progressive bloggers you considered influential enough to participate in today's conference call to help gain support for your health care agenda. "I'm sure Obama tried to call," he said, "while you were at the gym." With your numbers slipping, you might want to show more regard for my readers, who will, I'm sure, be indignant on my behalf and organize protests in major American cities as well as on the lawn of the White House. I just hope they don't trample Michele's vegetable garden.

Though I didn't hear from you personally, I saw you on TV, trying to persuade the general public that we need health care, "sooner, rather than later." Had I been among the elite group of bloggers included in the call, I would have shared what had been my highly successful strategy for pressing a very reluctant boyfriend to marry me "sooner, rather than later." By late autumn, all of America would be insured and enjoying long-overdue hip replacements, hysterectomies and appendectomies. And your ratings would reflect their appreciation.

Hillary, too, didn't call before leaving for Bangkok. If she had, I'd have given her the name of a tailor who'd custom make her pant suits for a fraction of what she pays here. Like me, she may not be on today's call sheet, but If you should speak to her, tell her to stop in at Milan Suit on Sukhumvit Road near Soi 14.