07/14/2014 01:21 pm ET Updated Sep 13, 2014



"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye." -- Miss Piggy,The Muppets

The concept of beauty has been one of the most debatable topics since the beginning of mankind. It has been an ever-changing concept throughout the years. Many philosophers have pondered on the concept of what beauty is and why humans find certain things more beautiful than another. Many artists painted or created sculptures of what they felt was beautiful.

What is "beautiful"? All around the world the concept of beauty is different. A small example: In America the better tan you have, the more beautiful you are considered. However in Asian countries the paler and more light skinned, the better.

In today's world women have been taking extreme measures to reach some skewed up beauty standard that we are trying to reach. They are injecting things, cutting themselves up , recreating their whole physical appearance to reach that one unrealistic Barbie-like standard of beauty.

So who decides what and who is beautiful? Sadly, I believe it is our media (which includes film & TV) that dictates this to our younger and older generation. Today we believe that skinny instead of healthy and active is better. We allow our teens to feel inadequate and unloved, because they aren't beautiful according to the standards of Hollywood. Girls as young as 6 years old start to talk about their weight and by the time they are 10 years old, it is a big part of their lives. So many young girls today struggle with eating disorders and identity crisis because they are just different and beautiful in their own way, they don't fit into the-skinny, blond, cheerleader category.

I also was once a young girl who felt very insecure about her looks. Not that family or friends ever said anything, but our society as a whole is who should be blamed. I was tall, had broad shoulders, glasses and just absolutely simple. But somehow I never got the attention of anyone. Even teachers tend to pay more attention to the pretty girls. I am not saying this out of any resentment, I am finally happy with who I am as a 44-year-old woman, yet I am still pushed to try to be that "perfect beauty." The wrinkle creams, Botox coupons, hair extensions, fillers, etc. -- I am constantly being emailed all sorts of coupons for age defying remedies.

Why doesn't the media or these large corporations understand, I don't want to be a plastic doll from the outside and be insecure if I get one wrinkle or I gain an ounce. I have finally learned to love myself; yes, I am a few pounds overweight, have crow's feet all around my eyes, have skin that's not perfect and hair that I need to color every few weeks, but I am me! If someone will really like me it will be for the person I am not because I have a Botox-ed forehead or a perfectly straight nose, how long do people hang around unpleasant people?

I have to say some of the most beautiful people I have seen in my life, were not "beautiful" according to our society's standards. They were people who didn't have the perfect body or a face created through plastic surgery, they were kind and loving. These beautiful people loved to be there for others, they were soft hearted, forgiving people. Even if we look through history, we have Maya Angelou or Mother Tereasa or even Oprah Winfrey. They have the most beautiful hearts as they were willing to help others.

We should consider the people who know how to love deeply or are positive influences or even people who are warriors of peace more beautiful than the stick skinny starved models we see on the runways.

So together we need to change the concept of beauty. The company that makes Dove has come out with a few amazing videos; make sure to watch this one. We need to let our younger generation understand that you are beautiful, because real beauty starts from the inside and slowly creeps out to your outside

"The beauty of a woman is not in a facial modification but the true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives the passion that she shows. The beauty of a woman grows with the passing years." -- Audrey Hepburn