06/08/2010 01:56 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

I Knew McDonald's Could Make Me Fat but Who Knew It Could Make Me a Gay Terrorist Too?

Fast Food is so addictive that when poor little rats were stuffed with the crap for 40 days, and then deprived of it and put on a healthy diet they "refused to eat, starving themselves for two weeks." In fact, according to That's Fit, junk food is as addictive as heroin.

So now that Mickey D's has gone and got us addicted to the transphat lifestyle, they turn around and force our innocent youth to adopt the gay lifestyle with commercials like this one:

Now that the commercial's gone viral, some unsuspecting horny hetero teen with a laptop, sitting innocently in his room lusting after girls, is going to watch this commercial, go gay, and never go back.

What's next, a McDonald's commercial for al Qaeda? Bill O'Reilly thinks so, but notice even he can't promise to get off the Mickey D burgers!

I always knew McDonald's food was a gateway drug, but now I have proof.

The president of The American Decency Association says that McDonald's has decided to throw "hundreds of millions of traditional family values" under the bus and "align themselves with promoting the godless behavior of a few."

The American Decency Association has finally realized it's no longer just McDonald's food that's poison. Let the boycotts begin! God knows it'll be good for our health.

And speaking of the gay agenda, Rihanna has a godless new video out -- she has clearly been poisoned by the Mickey D meat.

***Note to you Rihanna -- when some girl's kissing on you and saying "te amo" -- stop asking what she means. She's got one thing on her mind and it's not your singing! (It's the phat cash she's gonna make off sales from all the horny hetero teens with laptops lusting after the two of you. Provided, of course, the gay McDonald's commercial doesn't get to them first.)