My best friend is a Filipino with kids as old as me.
It also doesn't help that she's female and I'm male.
Now pay attention. I want you to notice what you think about this. I want you to notice what your immediate assumptions are. Do you believe me? Are you not sure? Do you think I must be lying?
Most of the time society assumes the worst.
They think we MUST be in a relationship. We MUST be hiding it from absolutely everybody. But no matter how much dirt my friends or her friends try to dig out, they still come up empty-handed every time.
That's because there's nothing happening.
You know what we do? We do things that normal friends would. We sit and talk. We laugh about work. We confide and trust one another. We go out. The chemistry that everyone else sees is so easily mistaken for love, but that's just because we know each other so well.
I can't tell you how this happened. The stars aligned and for some reason we had the perfect amount of compatibility. But if you think about it you'll see why we're compatible. I'm 23 and I'm very much open to everything. I want to learn from the experience of everyone.
What better way to learn about life than to talk to someone twice my age from another country? And guess what? I've learned more than you can ever imagine. It's the lessons that I've learned from this wonderful person that have shaped my decisions for the past year.
She told me one thing, and that was to stay single and enjoy life while I can. She got married when she was 21 and wished she could've done things over. I'm currently out in San Francisco, writing in my blog and travelling the United States. I owe it all to her.
The bigger point is that society is too often focused on the wrong things--like age, gender, race, and background. It's for this reason that our growth as human beings becomes stunted. We only hang out with those our age who want to party and fall in love on a whim. Why not become friends with someone older? Why not learn about the implications of a divorce and marrying early and having children?
There's a whole wealth of experience that we're missing out on. The grass isn't always greener on the other side. Many of my friends rushed to get married before they got to travel outside of their own state. I know from my experience with my best friend that this might not always be the best plan of action.
I learned so much from her.
I learned that being 40 doesn't mean you can't still have fun like you're 21. I learned that being a single parent demands a departure from how you acted before a divorce. I learned patience. I learned that there's a point where friends become family. I learned that Filipino people have the best hospitality.
My decision to commit social suicide by being seen with a woman twice my age in public paid dividends for me that I'll continue to reap for years to come.
Friendships can be weird, but I'm convinced that it's the most beautiful thing human beings are capable of creating. Don't limit yourself because of what people may think. I say, go for it.