There comes a point in every kid's life when he has a revelatory summer moment: In lieu of asking Dad for cash and running after the ice cream truck (exhausting), he realizes he can freeze his candy bars (efficient)! Of course, Snickers caught on to this trend and started making ice cream bars, but nothing beats the simplicity of the original. So in the spirit of summers past, we staged the ultimate frozen candy bar showdown -- and the best part? Everyone wins.
To do it, we asked our dads for money. Then we bought two of every popular candy bar in the store, froze one, and kept the other at room temperature. Then we tasted 'em both and decided once and for all which frozen one reigns supreme. Here's what we found:
9. PayDay
Room temperature: Salty. Chewy. Peanuty. Not a whole lot of candy in this candy bar.
Frozen: The frozen PayDay is so hard that Willy Wonka could've built his factory out of it. It is impenetrably chewy and has absolutely no give whatsoever. Not recommended for people who like their smile the way it is currently.
Winner: Neither. PayDay sucks.
8. Milky Way
Room temperature: I've always thought of Milky Way as Snickers' less cool, younger brother, and that stands up to scrutiny. There's just something lacking -- Snickers has peanuts, but, here, there's nothing to break up the gooey textural monotony. Don't get me wrong; it's good, just not great.
Frozen: Chewier than the room temperature version, to be sure, but that's really all that differs. Whereas some of the other caramel or nougat centers became crispy and brittle when frozen, Milky Way just became a bit sludgier. A bit of a disappointment.
Winner: Room temperature. Warmer nougat means a smoother ride.
7. Kit Kat
Room temperature: The slight meltiness of the chocolate here works to the wafer's advantage. Kit Kat is one of my favorite candy bars because of its simplicity, and, at room temperature, it's just about perfect.
Frozen: Unfortunately, the ingredients feel more isolated in frozen form, and the brittleness of the wafer when it is so cold makes it feel altogether less substantial, like there's nothing to it. I can feel the air a lot more, which would be a nice thing if we were in Spaceballs, but we're not. Still a pleasurable eating experience.
Winner: Room temperature. Keep your Kit Kats outta the freezer.
6. Reese's Peanut Butter Cups
Room temperature: Standard meltiness on the peanut butter. Velvety consistency.
Frozen: You can better notice the powderiness of the peanut butter formula here, but the package still works as a whole -- in fact, the colder peanut butter actually tasted richer for some reason, and made me crave a glass of milk. It should be noted, too, that with the frozen Reese's cup I got a perfectly clean separation from the wax paper. Beautiful.
Winner: Either. Reese's are always good, no matter the temperature.
5. York Peppermint Pattie
Room temperature: The mint is refreshing and jelly-like, and I'm just now realizing that this is basically a giant Junior Mint. A Senior Mint, if you will.
Frozen: I had high hopes for this one, and reality stood up to them relatively well. The frozen version resembles a hockey puck in a weirdly appetizing, wintry-themed way. The chewiness of the frozen version makes it feel almost like a frozen Thin Mint, which is awesome if you've ever tried that. The mintiness and the coldness make me feel clean for some reason... I might not even have to brush my teeth tonight! (But I will, or else Dad won't give me my allowance.)
Winner: Room temperature. Frozen is good, but nothing beats the texture of the mint when the pattie's been out for a while.
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