Tweets Of The Week
"I hate how I am a 'I have an appointment at 4pm so I can't do anything all day' type of person"
"So many people breaking up right now… Pre Valentine’s Day layoffs you might say..."
"Me at 1 day pregnant: omg the baby is craving a vacation in the south of France"
"hey sorry for being so anxious earlier i had no idea everything would be fine"
WHAT'S HAPPENING
"It's amazing how much I accomplish around the house under the threat of someone coming over"
"I suck so bad at sexting I'm like 'that can be arranged'"
"Prayers for my distraught 5yo whose pet ice cube just melted in his apple juice"
"So excited for my kids to return to school so I can spend my free time reading the 50 emails their school sends each day"
"I’m forever loyal to that password I chose at age 12"
"i don’t need a weighted blanket i need to be baked into a pie"