How many books have most of us read on leadership, performance, or marketing, for business?
What about psychological books, or perhaps, we've even drifted off into the area of new age Law of Attraction books?
We are always in search of the answer.
Many of us have given time to analyzing ourselves, our habits, our environment and opportunities to try and find the 'HIDDEN KEY' as to why we often feel as though we are failing, falling behind or are in some way not on top of our game.
This feeling we carry may not be apparent to others, though it is at the basis of how people disconnect from us as a leader.
Many of us do not want to feel uncomfortable feelings, we believe we should always feel good. For some of us we continue pursuing one thing after another, in hopes that we will finally feel fulfilled, satisfied or valued. Instead, we often feel judged. The biggest judge, of course, is the one within.
At work, the judge berates, devalues and criticizes every mistake, decision or conversation; it undermines confidence and trust in the self to be successful.
Some of us think we must ignore or deny these uncomfortable feelings, especially when we are trying to get the work done--we feel if those feelings are unleashed, we might as well crawl under our desk for the day. In reality, judging or stopping our feelings by dismissing what we feel, makes us feel worse.
To understand what triggers the disconnect, especially on the job, as a leader, would actually bring not only relief, but an ability to manage our emotions successfully. And if we can manage our emotions successfully, we learn how to manage others too.
If we start questioning our inner judge, which tries to monitor what we feel by stuffing bad feelings aside rather than allowing them, we start to experience freedom. The questioning of the judge, means we find the truth. We learn what is really 'lacking' is only our perception. The belief system we have of ourselves and the world around us, is changeable.
Change begins when we check into our thoughts throughout the day and challenge the ones, which are linked to a negative belief.
How often do we beat ourselves up? It is a clue as to what drives us and how we show up to other people. If we think negative thoughts, we let other people know through our own words and actions. As a leader it is detrimental to receiving their loyalty, collaboration and respect. We set ourselves apart from our true goals and gaining a team mentality when we are without the awareness, in which we're acting from internal judgments that are not being managed.
The judge living within us makes our lives more difficult. So, how to simplify?
1. Dare to connect to your emotions during the day. Know how you feel. Better yet, understand what is causing a feeling. Once you do, it will not be driving you unconsciously.
2. Whatever you resist persists. Don't avoid or deny negative emotions, again have awareness that you feel a certain way and then ask the question, "Is this feeling have validity for what is going on in this exact moment?" Most of the time it does not, and when it does, get to the WHY.
3. Make a choice. When you recognize your feelings and negativity is there--accept it and then make a choice. "I feel this way, and even though I feel this way, what can I do that is counter intuitive to the feeling, which will show my subconscious programming that I am breaking a pattern or belief?" And then act on it...and sometimes to act on it, just means to be conscious of it so you stop perpetuating a cycle in your professional relationships.
Photo By The Crystal Fairy
Our 2024 Coverage Needs You
It's Another Trump-Biden Showdown — And We Need Your Help
The Future Of Democracy Is At Stake
Our 2024 Coverage Needs You
Your Loyalty Means The World To Us
As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.
Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
The 2024 election is heating up, and women's rights, health care, voting rights, and the very future of democracy are all at stake. Donald Trump will face Joe Biden in the most consequential vote of our time. And HuffPost will be there, covering every twist and turn. America's future hangs in the balance. Would you consider contributing to support our journalism and keep it free for all during this critical season?
HuffPost believes news should be accessible to everyone, regardless of their ability to pay for it. We rely on readers like you to help fund our work. Any contribution you can make — even as little as $2 — goes directly toward supporting the impactful journalism that we will continue to produce this year. Thank you for being part of our story.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
It's official: Donald Trump will face Joe Biden this fall in the presidential election. As we face the most consequential presidential election of our time, HuffPost is committed to bringing you up-to-date, accurate news about the 2024 race. While other outlets have retreated behind paywalls, you can trust our news will stay free.
But we can't do it without your help. Reader funding is one of the key ways we support our newsroom. Would you consider making a donation to help fund our news during this critical time? Your contributions are vital to supporting a free press.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our journalism free and accessible to all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.
Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. Would you consider becoming a regular HuffPost contributor?
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. If circumstances have changed since you last contributed, we hope you'll consider contributing to HuffPost once more.
Support HuffPostAlready contributed? Log in to hide these messages.