Discovering more creative things to do to with one another sexually, especially after a number of years together, can be a chore for many couples. Then, there are those who may not be as experienced sexually who have a real desire to learn more in a private and safe setting, with and for their partner. Learning about sex can be achieved in a variety of ways; visits to "adult stores," how-to classes and, there's always porn. But, let's be honest -- how many people really have sex like we see it portrayed in adult films and how do you learn how? What do you do when you are anxious to learn, but want to protect the privacy you and your partner have?
Allow me to introduce you to Jessica Drake and her DVD series Guide to Wicked Sex. For those who may not know, Drake has been an award winning performer with Wicked Pictures for nine years and making the decision to become a porn performer was not something Drake took lightly.
Jessica Drake began her career in adult entertainment as a stripper, while working towards completing a degree in psychology. When Drake moved to California and decided to pursue a career making adult films, she put school on hold because she was working so much. As a result of her tenacity and work ethic, she is one of the featured adult stars for Wicked Entertainment. "I decided if I was going to do porn, I wanted to do it the best that I could. I wanted to brand myself and I had a business plan going in. I always came into it knowing it was going to be bigger than just porn," says Drake.
Clearly, she did something right because she is not only loved, but wildly popular with a devout legion of fans; there is a doll that is an exact replica of Drake in every way, she is a writer and director, the host of In Bed With Jessica Drake on Playboy Radio and a three-time AVN Best Actress Winner.
When she and I spoke, Drake was warm, smart, funny and is appreciative and respectful to her fan base. She shared during our conversation that at an autograph signing about three and a half years ago, a female fan had a number of questions for her. After the signing was over, Drake found herself having a very private conversation with this fan. It turned out this woman had never had an orgasm, which is unfortunately a common fact for many women. Drake took extra time and explained to this woman how to achieve orgasm and the woman emailed Drake to let her know that she finally had an orgasm. It was at this time that Drake thought about being a sex educator, as well as an adult performer: "This woman was my catalyst and she helped me decide that I can absolutely be a sex educator. A lot of other fans asked me questions regarding sex techniques and I realized educating was a logical next step," says Drake.
After this, an idea was born for Drake. She realized seemingly countless people have questions about sex. She decided to create DVDs that would allow people and couples to achieve the sexy results they want, without having to leave the privacy of their own home -- welcome to Jessica Drake's Guide to Wicked Sex. Covering fellatio, anal sex, female masturbation, anal play for men and threesomes, Drake uses real couples and porn stars to simulate scenes, as well as hard core sex scenes at the finale, to illustrate the point.
Drake was kind enough to send me all of her DVDs to review. Since this was research, I gave the DVDs to different people I know, to hear what their thoughts on Drake's how-to guides were.
Couple number one was given the DVD on fellatio and they found it helpful. They enjoyed watching the live demo and my friend said she learned a new trick to make fellatio new an exciting for her partner. While neither of them enjoyed all the talking involved on the DVD, they loved it and found it useful as great foreplay before they had sex.
A male friend took the female masturbation DVD home, wanting to learn better hand skills. The DVD answered several questions that he had on female response and he said that the demonstrations at the end were helpful. I watched the guide to anal sex with a friend of mine who happens to be a sex worker, so we could both critique it. What I appreciated, was the information Drake gave on hygiene, condoms and preparation. Many of my readers have said anal sex is a chore and I will say that the positions that Drake chose to use may not be for all beginners. If you and your partner are trying this particular sex act for the first time, realize the people in these DVDs are professionals who have had anal sex many times; don't feel badly if you can't perform exactly as it's demonstrated.
Afterwards, we moved on to the DVD about threesomes, which was informative and fun. It spoke of the importance of communication in relationships, especially when you decide to embark on a threesome. There must be a dialogue with all things negotiated prior to the threesome taking place. Drake did a good job of showing various positions that can be achieved, so that every person is involved. Watching her DVDs was fun, informative and sexy all at once.
Beyond the porn, the how-tos and the sex education, Drake has a radio show on the Playboy channel and a blog. She is also currently enrolled in a program to become a certified sex coach. As one of the busiest people in the industry, it will be interesting to see where her career takes her. I for one will be watching.