11/12/2013 04:09 pm ET Updated Jan 23, 2014

What's Your Brother Doing?

Wendi Aarons

The following are actual answers to that question from my son Jack regarding my other son, Sam:

  • Bothering me.
  • Bothering daddy.
  • Stealing all of the good Pokemon cards and keeping them in his secret drawer that isn't really a secret because I know where it is and also it has underwear in it.
  • Watching TV like he's not supposed to be doing.
  • Playing the computer like he's not supposed to be doing.
  • Eating upstairs like he's not supposed to be doing.
  • Scamming people on the Internet.
  • Eating sugar and chasing squirrels.
  • Crying because I think he glued his leg to something because he's not really moving much.
  • Dressing the cat.
  • Flossing the cat.
  • Eating the cat.
  • Reading a book about princesses. Hahahahaha! Tell him I said that.
  • Trying to crack the parent code on the TV.
  • Clipping his toenails in your bed.
  • Trust me, you DO NOT want to know what he's doing.
  • What brother?

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