10/31/2008 05:12 am ET Updated May 25, 2011

How Sarah Palin Won The Debate

Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, the Republican vice-presidential candidate, stunned observers by clearly winning her debate with Senator Joe Biden, the Democratic nominee.

Gov. Palin's surprising performance began with the first question, "How will Uyghur nationalism affect the future of the East Turkestan Islamic Movement?" Gov. Palin responded with a detailed history of separatism in Xinjiang province and a list of the home regions of Uyghur farmers, from Kashgaria to Uyghurstan. She then winked at the camera and said, "Gotcha!"

From then on, Sarah Palin demonstrated an encyclopedic knowledge of foreign affairs, economic policy, taxes, the environment and the novels of Alain Robbe-Grillat.

In what could be a related development, the same team who perfected the procedure which, as has been recently reported, enables Senator McCain to speak out of both sides of his mouth, are said to have performed the first successful brain transplant.