funniest tweets
"Really enjoying my kids heated backseat argument regarding *checks notes* are ducks birds"
"my kid was struggling to put her shirt on and screamed 'this is UNACCEPTABLE!' like a teeny tiny CEO"
"The dmv be like you forgot to bring the Declaration of Independence"
"1st kid: Has 21 pictures of baby blinking. 2nd kid: Has one blurry picture of graduation day."
WHAT'S HAPPENING
"The most realistic Harry Potter storyline is the one where he can’t handle that his girlfriend cries a lot"
"I honestly think we are asking too much of cauliflower."
"Have kids so they can interrupt your meeting to remind you that triceratops was the horniest dinosaur."
"My 4yo went to his school library and borrowed two books. We already own both books."
"I promised my husband a real show in the bedroom tonight. I hope he loves sock puppets."
“Every cat owner about their cat: ‘they’re like a dog’”